Friday, 5 January 2018

secret


A secret, I was never happy, just dulled,trapped in, deflated,
i give my words to build, to find myself, to repair my being, to kick the hatred,
Never liked "me" the person I could see, wasnt the person in my head, a clone with a different mind,
mirrors surround, reflecting back a face of the past, the one inside, the one im trying to find.

I let myself go, didnt care, was deep in the darkness, completely engulfed,
shadows surround, a part had died i thought,
though it goes it was just sleeping, dormant,
biding its time to show, to re-emerge and help me to grow.

I could never share my fear, or despair, it showed me weak, a wreck, a complete mess,
no connection to help, no guide in the dark, no hand to hold,  to express,
Let the drink control, it took hold, wouldnt let go, dragging me down below,
created a person i didnt know, didnt recognise, one  i dispised, cross the streets to avoid this fellow.

This could have beat me, i was in retreat, i lay my anger at everyones feet, on their floors,
I could be mean, a bad face in the streets, i ignored my flaws,
The threat of death gave me a door, a way through a path all new,
a glimps at some meaning, a new briefing, a true begining.

I remembered the me i liked, found the parts i dispised, threw them out,
Slowly cutting away the bad, to replace with good, a new mood, a rejuvination,
so now i build each day, write to let my thoughts shine, to elucidate, and beat my frustration,
my race has begun, a fun run to go on, hope its a long one.


Thanks for reading.
 




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