make up

The make up is a cover up, a lie to hide the shy girl inside, a kind heart,

a fretful worried soul, afraid to let the world in, since he tore her apart,

hides under layers, masks to distract from her, to cover fear, bury it deep,

it protects for now, sits at the core, fear setting itself free when she tries to sleep.

She concealed the tears, under a veil and cried every night, afraid who might find out,

self worth, shredded, she was never enough, yet always gave love,

how could he make her so low, how could she love him so?

yet she always knew it was just a way of letting go.

hidden in plain sight, under a bright light, a show of confidence, so free,

yet under the clothes and the look, a scared girl, the girl came unstuck,

her fear showed to me, a glimpse past the cover, past the smoke and mirrors,

another lost soul just searching for her place in this world and its terrors.

She tried to hide for so long, but what always shines through is beauty inside,

the smile on her lips says it will eclipse, it will pass, the tears have dried,

and we can start to see the true girl in you, a loving caring delight,

a beginning, fresh and new, a beautiful sight.

Thanks for reading.
kyle

cut

This time it cut too deep, was it a cry for help? a heart that cried,

was it a way out, to leave behind feelings, to stop the pain that resides inside,

shut it all out, lock the door and block it outside,

the blood flowed and rained, a terrible way to hide,

Mistakes made, was this insane, or just a misfiring brain,

wave of emotions, a commotion, the world felt so wrong, so far gone,

could never belong, couldn't fit, nothing hit, just a waste,

collection of bad days, dark memories, left a bad taste,

those scars never heal, but they help reveal your soul, your heart and your whole,

they stay to show a path not to follow,  to regrow, go with the flow,

to remind that this isn't all that bad, there are good days where you avoid the potholes,

help you get strong,  learn to live on,  cling to it all, enjoy a new glow.

Thanks for reading.
kyle (hope filled poet)

love song

2 am, the song plays on repeat again, fills my ears with memories that ring,

the words recall a special day, those years ago, in spring,

the day bygone where our eyes did catch, I saw you dance, so precious, so nice,

you sang a verse, a voice so warm, as perfect a sound as paradise.

This song, was ours, it filled our hearts, swirled into our souls,lifted us, gifting love,

the meaning so true, its passions we knew, as if was written for us, a song from above,

a beat that lulled us in, to give in, to make our first moves,

to share our first kiss, a first taste of bliss.

Two hearts entwined, we danced in time, alive, so close, all night,

we loved with a fresh view, of the world anew, our smiles, a wonderful sight,

the music would stop, it always does, but the song remains,

it plays on again, the sounds still so sweet, so perfect so free, but without you.

It is never the same.

Thanks for reading
kyle (the hopeless romantic poet)

empty house

This void, unfilled, this house so cold, so empty, devoid,

once there was joy, warmth, love and noise,

now only silence, so still, like a cemetery, a grave,

a part of me died that night, left alone, all I loved gone, tears flowed in waves.

No warning, no signs, arrive home, find it empty of love, gone, no one, stings like a knife,

felt my heart break, cracked as it gave way, drained inside, no fight, no life,

its beat a memory, distant, past, as I searched for a clue,

floated room to room, like a ghost, to understand you.

Tears, unstoppable, uncontrollable, a dam burst  released the hurt,

this night recurs constantly, in dreams, nightmares, tries to make me fall apart,

I see you there smiling and laughing every time I close my eyes,

this home where no love lives, just me, my soul splits, and I cry.

Too scared to connect, to get close, to let go, to be hurt,

built walls, defences against all, left myself in that hole to wait, inert,

sat in darkness, embrace its calmness, it comforts, keeps me from that night,

inside I know at heart, need to get out and fight.

Thanks for reading. this is another very personal piece, it isn't an easy part of my life to look back on, but sometimes writing is good therapy!

Kyle

mood/doom

Mood flips into doom, a constant worry, as it shifts gears, builds, gains, an oppressive day,

mind slides as i grind down, an unexpected attack, a blank gloom, a grim hue almost grey,

off button pressed, feel depressed, i stress, pressure on my chest, lightness in my head, i sway,

goosebumps cover my skin, fear that lays within breaking free, to visit to stay,

panic inside, like ice, i shiver and shake, as if in an earthquake, no rest,

my heart skips beats, they collide and trip in their own time, anxiety, a test, beating at my chest,

sweat pours as the thoughts roar in my head a fire of doubt, creeping me out, i am distressed.

speak out, almost shout, silence is heard, no single word, killed my voice, no noise, cant express.

Cant leave, this is my curse, locked in my head with this voice, my voice, that says "I'm worse", 

it holds me tight in its embrace in place, my heart continues to pace,

anxiety my constant companion, my partner my lover,

my enemy, an adversary, my other.

-------

this is a tad disjointed and certainly needs work, but it feels like a panic attack does, all over the place and disorientated.
so thanks for reading.
kyle (the nervous wreck of a poet)

Why?

Why do we fall for people who don't want to know,

for those who cant give you time, their love or be kind?

why does the heart grow fonder, for those whose eyes like to wander,

rather than stand by your side, share in your joy and your pride?

why do we trust those who betray, who lie to our face everyday,

who wouldn't think twice than to stick in the knife, and ruin our lives anyway?

why does the heart yearn, for ones that string you along, then turn and run,

who couldn't give love,  share in the warmth that turns our days into songs?

why do we give so much, never expecting a thing,

for someone that couldn't even fake a smile, say hi, or anything?

why does the the heart ache for those, who can only break never build,

who destroy all the good they have, just to make them feel thrilled?

why does my heart sing so much for you,

even when all these words ring oh so true?

Thanks for reading,
kyle(the questioner?)

Disclaimer. if you believe these words are about you then please ask yourself why!
they are not about anyone in particular, just thoughts, they have some basis in reality but not to any particular time or person, so panic ye not!

Demons of old.

A whiskey to chase the demons away,

keep bad dreams at bay,

to dull the thoughts, alleviate the pain,

push the dark away, to close off my brain.

Darkness still clouds, crowds, as another goes down,

the golden liquid burns the throat, sees my memories drown,

the warm heady fuzz, less a buzz, more a constant crush,

As if concussed, lost, no thoughts, no more, just a hush.

The tears sting, watering down my drink,

they bring hurt, when did this begin?

thought id blacked out, let it all die, but the flashbacks begin anew,

the pain regains its hold as I begin to cry, tears flood because of you,

Frail mind passes out, collapses, too many empty glasses

failed again, cant get free, to escape me, all left in ashes,

pillow wet with tears, wept for all those missed years, all my fears,

sun rises, another day, pass the bottle, drink it all away, cheers.

This was one of the hardest pieces I've written yet, comes from a very real place, one that happily i did escape, but every day has its reminders of those times. so thank you for reading, it helps me to understand myself better and to regrow, to find my place again.
And that was also my 50th post! 

Kyle (the sober rock and roll poet)

Escape

Escape, we all seek, a way out, freedom, free from our minds,

some use drugs, to numb the thoughts in their heads, their grinds,

to drive away demons of the past, the memories that last, to find their Elysium,

close doors on their histories, their stories, to feel oblivion.

Escape, the prison of the mind, its walls so high, holds us in place,

some turn to drink, to cleanse the fragile state, clear their slate, to erase,

the doubts, hurt we caused ourselves and others,

the lies, the hate and rage, the cries late at night, save us,

Escape, a room with no doors no windows, a dark gloom,

some use work, swapping one cell for another,

give no time to others, to give their worth to bosses,

never given the praise, just to be away from their losses,

Escape, we all have ways to break from our days,

for some its sex, go from one lover to another,

never giving in to emotion or feelings just using to be free,

to feel some worth, never realising it is all within,

the path exists for us all, just find it to begin,

we all search for our drug, to run, to get out, to blank our stays,

if you look inside there is still good, it resides, it gains, always,

live with it, love it and face it, this life can be a hit,

instead of seeking escape, lets embrace it.

Thanks for reading.
kyle.(The writer of words)

Betrayal

Faded pages, old words, given new meaning, now I know your game,

your lies, betrayed all that was nice, made me feel at blame,

trusted with my feelings, you tore them up into tiny scraps,

I gave you my love, my life, my entire being, a mistake perhaps.

Photos of smiles, happy days in bliss,

a deceit, a fiction, with you it was always hit or miss,

left scars in my heart, and in my mind

wounds, open, exposed, my health declined.

Memories like movie screens, showing the story of our days,

they were false, built on dishonesty, caused much malaise,

a fall into a place unknown, a dark gloom, hard to escape,

as much as I tried, fought my mind, couldn't get my life in shape.

Days turned to weeks, to years, I started to break through,

to let myself free, to stop blaming me, gave me hope to look to,

to see that each day has meaning,

every day a new beginning.

thanks for reading.
kyle.(the betrayed poet)

Climb

Let the mind wander, in wonder, a journey in time, a climb,

lets travel far and wide, taking in sights and sounds,

soaking up the feelings around, they abound,

collect thoughts, to set you free, to live, to heal, to be.

each memory, story or tale of the past, make them last,

use to create a new fate, set the date,

this is day one of your run, a new day in the sun,

a fresh way forwards, to journey upwards.

every passing day a distinct test, enjoy the challenge, be your best,

rock bottom seems so far down, keep fighting all year round,

take none of this for granted, you crafted, created, with the seeds planted,

in time your climb is done, enjoy the view, forever true, a world anew,

thanks for reading.
kyle.(the upwards facing poet)

Love

Into your eyes, I stared, intently, deeply, lost in your gaze,

a strange magnetic pull, tempts me closer, heart ablaze,

the smile on my lips, could tell a thousand words,

as we sailed away, into our minds, into deep worlds.

In those moments we clicked, we connected, a fragile delicate state,

Feelings of trust, love and hope, was this fate?

absorbed by your words, the world could have stopped, I wouldn't know,

in your hold transfixed, a shift in the lens, heart aglow.

your presence felt pleasant, fresh, freeing, all we could be,

Skies sang with songs of joy, a love as big as the open seas,

in your company, happy, beyond words, just our feelings in tune,

the heart grew, the soul knew, this love would forever bloom.

Love, sometimes complicated can be simple too,

to share, care, treat with respect, to be true,

give with your heart, your mind, make all feel whole,

Accept happiness, trust and honesty, let it fill your soul.

thanks for reading.
kyle (just a born romantic lol)

Vampires

Vampires, draining our blood,

sucking out all that is good,

the horrors faced day to day,

not monsters from silver screens, but monsters within,

We have it all wrong, chasing paper to feel we belong,

giving away our time, our hopes, our primes,

to those that wouldn't care if we lived or died,

as long as they get their way, as long as they get payed,

we hurt people who have nothing to give,

no roof over their heads, no warm cozy beds,

bad choices or bad rolls of the dice, put them here,

still we kick them, beat them down, make them feel fear,

no matter where you are born, where you reside,

we all have a right to a life lived with pride,

All deserve hope, a fairer life,

to live free in peacetime,

the poor, undesirables, the vulnerable, the weak and beaten down

we all have a say, a place in this world, so stand tall, stand proud,

we just need to break our human curses, fighting for money power and greed,

about time we fought for our lives, the people, their needs,

The monsters of old have nothing on us, they sucked us dry,

ignited fear in the blink of an eye,

has anything changed?

vampires still bleed us dry, except now they wear a suit and tie.

thanks for reading.
kyle(the slightly political punk rock poet)

timeline

Timeline so full of holes, gaps where days should be,

some distant memory, now sits empty,

drained away, cleaned out, left with just a cloudy space,

a blank page, thoughts, faces that i can't place,

cycle begins again, turn through the cogs in my mind,

moments i hide, feelings i try to find,

lost days, weeks that elude,

scenes of a movie that can't be viewed.

look in old diaries, was this the real me?

was this how i used to be?

was i in a dream? a nightmare maybe?

its hard to tell, the image is so shady.

Sometimes a crack forms, letting in some past event,

a small piece of the puzzle, a brief segment,

those are minor fragments, they don't last long,

stories gone, just snippets of my song.

thanks for reading,
kyle.(who am i again)

downpour

The grey deluge, falling like sheets, mood spikes,

this downpour, a dreary dark sky, more, a thunderstrike,

ground swells underfoot, feels spongy, wet like mush,

flood warning, dont panic dont rush

village drowning, sinking, the river rising, an ominous oppressive wave,

as the heavens open again, a great torrent falls afresh, intense, mood now grave,

knee deep in murky, dirty water, dark grey blue in colours,

thoughts pushing by like debris, under its clouded hidden covers,

two days now, will this ever end, a depressive rage fills me again

the feeling of loneliness has grown, with each single drop of rain,

the dark clouds overhead begin to lighten,

a glint of sun breaking through near the horizon,

The rains begin to slow, ground clears as my mood begins to grow.

A desire to rise higher, to see the greens coming through,

to feel the suns beams anew,

to dry up the sodden ground, dry out the rain, to clear my head again.

thank you for reading.
kyle(the dripping wet poet)

Raging / fire

You made me hate, caused me to feel such rage,

a fire burning, engulfing all in flames,

you gave me reason to despise, all the good things in life,

left me so bitter and twisted inside,

The inferno grew, stoked on by every thought of you,

searing my memories and scorching my world view,

the lies that you told heated my passions,

built up a burning distrust, a lack of compassion,

The blistering heat, white hot, with a feverish lowness,

ignited a sense of something to fight for,

to use my anger for good, to stop feeling such self pity,

and extinguish the enkindled blaze that consumed me.

Thanks for reading.
kyle.(the hottest poet in town)

life and death

Death, the great unknown, the great beyond,

a place we don't yet belong,

I've encountered your gatekeeper a handful of times,

always said my name isn't down, my bell hasn't chimed,

The fear that it brings, a fear of our ending,

the story has changed, no idea where its heading,

the music has stopped, the dance has stuttered,

the bar has closed, the doors are all shuttered,

life, so precious, yet most of us waste it,

never slowing to stop and taste it,

sample its wonders, delight in its treasures,

we rush around, causing too much displeasure,

All that is good is within your control,

your senses can feel all that is wonderful,

your heart can give so much joy,

just open it up and share it with all,

A playground for us, a place of so much,

don't let it be spoiled by greed and mistrust,

open your arms, embrace all that is new,

and enjoy each new storyline you come to.

Don't regret the paths took over past years,

regret those left unexplored through embarrassment or fears

thanks for reading.
kyle(the thoughtful poet)

Oh moon

Oh moon, lost its shine,

hangs dull, in the night sky, a sign,

its barren landscape, barely visible,

empty, soulless, left to feel miserable,

A tear filled eye

Was never alone with the moon and stars,

the constellations kept me company,

so much to see, millions of years on display,

so much beauty, worlds so far away,

An escaped cry

Made me believe, the was more on Earth,

we shared a love, you gave me worth,

then took it so fast, as if pulled into a black hole,

left with just an empty, aching soul,

A lonely sigh.

Thanks for reading.
Kyle(the stargazing poet)

hurt

I could never hurt you, i know this to be true,

its a lie I've heard too many times, but a real feeling for you,

into my life, you walked, with an ethereal motion,

i looked into your eyes, my pulse raced with emotion.

A story book cliche, love at first sight,

a romantic fiction, used in fables, but it happened this night,

As soon as you came into view i knew,

that all the tales were true,

electricity filled the air, like a charge of static,

a quick glance turned to a stare, my pulse now erratic,

my eyes couldn't leave your face, its beauty being memorised,

each slight shift, a smile, a twitch, left me mesmerised,

A vision etched in my mind,

A glimpse of a world id love to find,

As her gaze caught mine, heart stopped,

as if it flatlined,

But i could never share these feelings,

i am but a lowly man, you are destined for better things,

At least i saw your smile, see i could never hurt you,

you could never hurt me, i had already run a mile.

thanks for reading.
kyle.(the poet that ran a mile)

stardust

Where do we reside? inside?

beside the bones? behind the eyes, ears, nose, mouth?

senses all alive

in our skins, where we feel the touch of a delicate flower, a tender lover?

our heads, where thoughts are bred?

or do we float? above and about,

watching over and around, sensing all.

every thought, tingle, sting every grin.

all of this and more,

we are consiousness, a whole, one and all,

we are stardust, the universe as one,

living, breathing, thinking, feeling, loving, caring, sharing,

there are no labels, no differences, all the same, a role to play.

so share your part of the story and enjoy your days.

thanks for reading, really dont want to mess around with this one too much, it is delicate and fragile like a flower made from glass, it came to me in a dream almost fully formed.
kyle.(the extremely tired having been rudely awakened by words trying to get out of his head poet)

About me

So someone asked me the other day how i write my pieces, where they come from and if i have any routine to it, so i thought id just ramble on a bit here about just that subject...

Well firstly i carry a notepad everywhere, just to take down any little thoughts or inspiration that jumps out at me, usually just a line or two, a spring board to start working from.
Sometimes these can be sat for quite some time, a few of these pieces have come from lines i wrote years ago that i have only just found a meaning for.
Some of the pieces are autobiographical, others take a feeling or a setting that i have had, and plays around with the storyline slightly.
A lot of my work can sound dark or depressive, but that is mostly what i like to write about, i am generlly a fun loving guy that loves a laugh and a joke, but my writing is from a place that doesnt really fit that tone, maybe one day i will write a funny upbeat bright colourful piece but i wouldnt hold my breath!!!

After this i write a few very rough drafts, if i feel it is going somewhere then i keep going and try to get a good feel for how it is going to turn out.
else they go back into the collection of lines, inspiration etc.

then comes the fun part, listening to music!
I usually start this after midnight, it is a time where i am completely able to lose myself, go off into new worlds, or revisit old ones, so at 12:01 i open up my spotify playlists and get to work.
this is my way of writing, i love to find music that fits the mood i am going for with the piece, i have quite a collection of tunes that fit each emotion i am after.
so i write with headphones on music playing loudly, and i do this over and over until i have a piece that i can call my real first draft, i then type it up and change nearly every single line, editing and playing, this is draft 1.1, none of the work is ever finished, it is a snapshot of the piece it will become in time.

So music then, well i am in my mid 30's so i tend to focus mostly on bands from my era which is the late 80's  90s and early 00's
i favour rock music, it has the passion, the anger, the raw emotion that i want to get across in a lot of my work.
though ive tried numerous different styles and genres, a few classical albums, some pop, some soul, always something with a life to it though.

A few artists i could talk about forever, that really take me to some interesting places are

Nick Cave - this guy just oozes brilliance, every single album can surprise you, none of them sound alike, he has written some amazing stuff and is a great poet/lyricist to boot, definately worth a listen to.

Mark Lanegan - basically nick cave just darker more rocking and one of my all time favourites.

Alice in chains/layne stayley - this guy could rock better than most, sadly died too young but a great collection of albums and tracks that really take you on an emotional journey.

Matchbox 20/rob thomas - i just love this guys style, so simple yet brilliant, a very polished artist but there are songs that really move me, one of my all time favourites is "you wont be mine", this one brings tears to my eyes every time i hear it.

there are so many more, this is just a small collection and i would be here all night just listing bands if i carried on!!

Anyway, thank you for reading this, hope it was interesting, and im going to put my headphones on and see where the journey takes me.

kyle.

time passes

The timing was never right, our clock never quite chimed,

the moment was always wrong, too ill timed,

the seconds ticked past, i couldnt make my pass,

as the hours flew by, i reached an impasse,

days turned to weeks, i saw you falling for him,

still i sat silent, just biding my time,

by week three you were a couple it seemed,

months drove on, you made the life you had always dreamed,

the years flowed by, you got married i saw,

had a family, so loving and pure,

i sat watching the clock, its hands creeping onwards,

the man in the mirror growing older, weathered.

The passing of time, so kind to you all,

i could never complain, it is what you deserved,

a passage of time, that gave passion and life,

and i know that you make the perfect wife,

i often wonder late at night, if the time had been different,

if my shyness had lessened, would this have been us,

sharing in the wonders,

eyes open wide, to be by your side, or was it destiny,

that our clocks remained unsynchronised,

that time was never on our side.

Thank you for reading.
kyle(The clock watching poet)

war/torn

 

To die in war, a glory? or a waste of a story?

to die for our leaders and their power dealers?

to fight an enemy that is just like me?

doesn't sound like a victorious battle, sounds like we are used like cattle.

is it a just war? what are we fighting for?

oil and profit, hitting our targets, clearing out nations,

just for our own aspirations,

to fill the coffers, to make men wealthier,

id rather live healthier, with a sound state of mind,

be able to sleep at night, knowing we can be kind.

Thanks for reading.
kyle

frozen wastes

This wasteland, frozen in time, a cold desolate space,

a place that used to thrive, long ago, in distant climes,

the rays of sunlight barely raise the heat,

the freezing mists cling to uncovered skin, a tear turns to ice,

in  this the home of the shattered heart, of love long gone, a place that bites.

The distant sun, an aquantance of better days,

 its searing heat a memory to me, its warmth barely caresses these peaks,

the moonlight, the only friend in sight, a companion so to speak,

alone in this glacial seclusion, the bleak expanse,

A withered dormant feeling, a place of no romance,

The silence, not golden, makes my thoughts louder,

in this abominable, piercing confinement, i flounder,

until the day the bright sun breaks through, finds its heat to lay on me,

a day i hope wont delay in arriving, to bring its warmth and passion,

to set my heart ablaze and set me free from this depression.

thanks for reading,
kyle.

our song

Our song plays on the radio, it preys on my torn heart,

the beat reverberates, the words take me back to the start.

back then, you looked in my eyes and i could feel the love,

you held me we kissed, as the warm rain fell from above.

We always danced to our own tune, you and I, so alive,

the guitar picked perfectly, trapped in a moment, our hearts collide,

A bass line, divine, moved our rhythm, kept us close, held us tight,

to share our kisses all night.

Soon the song ends, the track finishes, the memories diminish.

do I play it again, to feel those dreamlike moments

where we loved like no one else mattered,

or do i find a new song, let those memories shatter?

Thanks for reading.
Kyle

human/kind

We came like a wrecking ball,

a human bulldozer, crushing, crashing, destroying all,

we mess up our world, we destroy and devastate,

one day at a time, its our natural state,

a curse on this world, a blemish on its perfect face,

a destructive force, this human race.

Worse than beasts, they kill for food, to fulfill need,

we do it for sport, for profit, for greed,

we go to school where we learn lifes rules,

if you want to succeed, you have to be cruel,

you could say i hate our race,

for most part you're right, but it has a place.

We also have love, a bond so unique,

a kindness inside that we try to seek,

we have art, a beauty that is ours to share,

to give to others, to show we care,

we have so much good inside,

just need to open our eyes wide,

see the world for its greatness,

and live long in it; it is  gracious and precious.

Thanks for reading

say, okay

A delicate balance, between happy and sad,

dash of hurt, pinch of pain, comes crashing again, bad,

a touch of good and im on cloud nine, head held high, i try,

to sit between, never go too far either way,

though it's easy to say.

A flicker of hope, can be the curse,

lifts you up, to drop you further, making it worse,

A dose of sceptism is needed, never believe it,

never trust a day, to go your way, til its ended,

until you can say.

my mind always on overdrive, overthinks and strives,

to find meaning, where it can't lie, where it doesn't lay,

a moment to reflect, to stop projecting thoughts,

believe in the truth and keep all else at bay,

only then can you say.

today i am okay

Thanks for reading.

secret

A secret, I was never happy, just dulled,trapped in, deflated,

i give my words to build, to find myself, to repair my being, to kick the hatred,

Never liked "me" the person I could see, wasnt the person in my head, a clone with a different mind,

mirrors surround, reflecting back a face of the past, the one inside, the one im trying to find.

I let myself go, didnt care, was deep in the darkness, completely engulfed,

shadows surround, a part had died i thought,

though it goes it was just sleeping, dormant,

biding its time to show, to re-emerge and help me to grow.

I could never share my fear, or despair, it showed me weak, a wreck, a complete mess,

no connection to help, no guide in the dark, no hand to hold,  to express,

Let the drink control, it took hold, wouldnt let go, dragging me down below,

created a person i didnt know, didnt recognise, one  i dispised, cross the streets to avoid this fellow.

This could have beat me, i was in retreat, i lay my anger at everyones feet, on their floors,

I could be mean, a bad face in the streets, i ignored my flaws,

The threat of death gave me a door, a way through a path all new,

a glimps at some meaning, a new briefing, a true begining.

I remembered the me i liked, found the parts i dispised, threw them out,

Slowly cutting away the bad, to replace with good, a new mood, a rejuvination,

so now i build each day, write to let my thoughts shine, to elucidate, and beat my frustration,

my race has begun, a fun run to go on, hope its a long one.

Thanks for reading.
 

Hospital pt 2

Chased down, A kaleidoscopic dreamscape surrounds,

the sounds, buzzing, beeping, distract my thinking,

music, like no other, like nothing ive heard, a true hit,

like a mix, a blend, of the best bands ive seen,

Voices whisper, yet im alone, the words hold meanings, feelings,

if only i could hear their significance,

tone changes, sharply, brakes, a fear drops, a dread,

grips tight as i hold my bed,

The drip in my arm, feeding my vision, or keeping me grounded,

whilst all is flying around me,

see faces from the past, distant memories long lost, they watch over me,

keeping company, holding the fear at bay, keeping my dread away.

Body wants to stop, brain wont let it,

a choice is made, to fight through this, climb from the abyss, to soar above,

grip on to life, to share my love.

 The beauty of all art is that it is never truelly finished, each of my pieces is still in the rough drafts stage of its life, and over time they will nearly all be played around with rewritten, tidied up, given more depth etc, for example i have been reading this piece over and over and can see a lot wrong with the last chunk of it, it is missing a real ending, a good bit of depth and meaning, in time i will find the right way to make this work.


so here is revision 2 (well 2 and all the scribbled out, crumpled up pieces of paper that went into each draft before draft 1 lol) , still work in progress, but already seeing some improvements...

Chased down, a kaleidoscopic dreamscape surrounds,

the sounds, buzzing, beeping, distract my thinking,

their constant rhythm like a heart beating,

as i feel its finally beat me, im retreating.

 

music, like no other, like nothing ive ever heard, a true hit,

like a mix, a blend, of the best bands ive seen,

voices whisper, yet im alone, the words hold meaning, feelings,

if only i could glean their significance.

 

Tone changes, sharply, brakes, a fear drops, my body quakes,

A dread grips tight as i hold my bed,

the drip in my arm, feeding my visions? or keeping me grounded?

whilst all is flying, floating around me,

 

see faces from my past, distant memories, watching over me,

keeping company, holding my fear at bay, keeping the dread away,

my body aches to stop, my mind wont let it,

the grains of sand drip, time slips and passes,

 

A flood of tears as i hear, deaths hand had touched mine,

it was near, my fear drove me on,

i was too young, not ready for death, nor my last breath,

a long battle ahead, to fight to make right, to get strong,

 

The nurse gave comfort, words of encouragement,

my family brought love and warmth, the souls nourishment,

the journey had begun, it would be long,

but i vow to fight on, one step at a time.

 
Thanks for reading.
Kyle

Social phobia.

Try to talk, voice cracks, it croaks,

rush out, crash out, a fail state, a wasted space, chokes.

Alone then, way its always been, safer still, stay in,

Dont talk, dont speak, hide away, cant be seen

tune out the outside, phone down, messenger off, alone now,

no one misses, no one knows, as tears flow, just alone,

 

Didnt choose this, it took me, i try to flee,

sometimes escape its grasp, more often it tightens its clasp.

So if you see me, dont laugh, pity or be sad,

i have evaded its claws, made it to the door,

broke out, gained ground, began to climb,

beat the fears, held back the tears, one day at a time.

Thanks for reading, it means a lot.

distrust

Trust, all drained away, circled the plughole, flowed from our day,

never again, I swore, as I let you in once more,

took you back, three words, set me a trap,

believed the lies, til i caught you with your other guy,

All the times we shared, now nothing that stood, nothing but deadwood,

you promised so much, you made me believe, i gave you all that i had, i gave all that i could,

Still you slept away, and i marked the day,

never again, trust eroded away,

thanks for reading.

stolen

She stole from me, took something,

a longing, sense of belonging,

gone in an instant, taken from me,

all gone, a long con, now empty.

She took, the thing that kept me strong,

it kept me going, fighting on,

kept my blood flowing, and then she was gone.

she knew it, still she removed it,

ran with it, abused it.

she withdrew all we had, vanished in the blink of an eye,

no tears left to cry, to part was enough,

to lose this aswell, it hurt like hell, so tough.

she stole from me, she took my heart.

thanks for reading.
Kyle (the heartless poet?)

yellow

Skin, tinged yellow, not good, a bad sign,

a reason to say no, to stop, to quit, to let go of it,

to get rid, to bid farewell, too late, boarding a train to hell.

Stomach aches, throbbing, stabbing pains,

a drain, a last calling, a warning, too late, weve boarded.

Warnings ignored, once more, i fell to the floor,

again, i lay in wait, just hoping ive not sealed my fate.

my head trips, floats and flits, a voice splits the air,

a direction to follow, a new journey to travel,

if i just pull through, hold on and wake anew.

too young, the metallic taste in my throat, here goes,

stay strong, pull through,

youve got a lot of living to do.

thanks for reading.

climate of hate

Passion, in hearts, in minds, in our times,

a climate of hate, need to be eradicated,

educated, its misled, mindless, misguided,

the fools that spout it think themeselves inspired,

bullies that despise all who are enlightened,

they are just cowards, scared to see diffence,

scared of change and so short sighted,

the world should be united,

division just breeds hate, yet were all the same,

our blood it bleeds red,

love not war, will save us, give more

save us from this downpour of bile,

a sickness its vile,

this hate in the end, will devestate,

 leave in its wake a wreck of a world we once all called home,

 or we could stand up and not let it win,

 change minds.

thanks for reading.
Kyle(the pissed off poet)

Heroes

Be nice, kind words save lives,

heroes come in all forms, all sizes, shapes, religions and race, all are heroes to me

heroes dont need powers or to fly,

just a shoulder on which one can cry,

a warmth in their hearts to share,

to show that they care,

An ear just to listen, this can help make a difference,

can set someone free to live resililiently,

words of comfort, encouragement and hope,

can help someone to be strong and to cope,

A guide in dark times,

a hand to hold in our climbs.

so be a hero, if ever you are needed,

and know that all you do is appreciated.

Thanks for reading.
Kyle

the losers club

We Are the geeks, losers, freaks,

spread the word, the world will learn,

we are the lost, the weird, unique,

each one a different beast,

Be who you want, dont conform to a norm,

that judges on looks, or laughs at your kooks,

just be free, be unique, who you are,

youre a star, in our hearts, thats a start.

Not alone, were around all the time,

in the clubs, in the cities, in your towns,

in the corners, in the dark out of sight,

you may see us enjoying the night,

we are human, we are the same,

under our skins we share the same frame,

so let us in, dont be scared, we dont bite,

we just want to share the sights and our lives.

Thanks for reading.
much appreciated.
Kyle (the geeky loser poet)