You were a ball of energy,
excitement in every breath.
What happened to the dreams?
Did you leave them behind
in some shady bar,
locked in after midnight.
Were the dreams
just alcohol fuelled breath?
Then the hangover kicked in
and hasn't left yet.
You used to be
like a firework exploding,
was that all smoke and bluster?
Was loud noise and flashiness
all you could muster?
Life of the party,
I heard them say,
death of a mood,
I fell away.
I couldn't be swayed
by the slurred words
you would spray.
Vodka and spit
in every barbed reply,
every put down,
every rolled eye sigh.
No-one was safe
from your acid bile,
when the empty glasses
started to pile.
You had the fight within
to defeat almost anything,
Any demon
would shake and quiver
Rather than hear the put downs you delivered.
Where did it all go?
Lost its fight
along with your liver..
You used to talk the talk
but could barely
walk at all.
Into a taxi
you would sprawl.
On all fours,
by the end of the night,
some guy you can't remember
or a date with your head down
the white ceramic throne,
as back up your throat
your stomach contents are thrown.
But back then
I knew you,
I frequented the same lock ins,
I drank the same poison.
We weren't so different,
I guess.
But my dreams
were not of causing distress.
My dream sang of universes,
bigger than ours,
of stars that would light the sky.
I just didn't know back then
how to put my dreams
Into words.
If I had tried they would
have all been slurred..
So now, although I have a screwed up liver
I have much more
in my head to go out and deliver
and my head is clearer.
Thanks for reading
Please take a look at my new collection "Torn Pages"
100+ all new poems not shared here before.
https://tinyurl.com/KCtornpages
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