Not okay

 

It's so much easier

to say I'm tired,

than to state out loud

that the anxiety

is getting to me.

It's easier to put on a smile,

when inside your heart is beating

one hundred miles an hour.

It's easier to say I'm fine,

when the thoughts climb

through your mind

like clinging vines

dragging you down.

 

But I'm not okay,

everything is

piling on top of me.

I don't feel comfortable

outside my enclosed room.

I can feel arms grabbing me,

pulling to my tomb,

consuming my thoughts

in a veil of doom.

I can seem distant, aloof,

but in truth I want the same things as you.

Only, my mind sits confused

by the outside world

all of the noise and light

clouding my view.

 

It's easy to put on a mask,

the character you have created

for when people ask,

are you OK mate? You have gone very quiet.

All the while you feel

like you are living through

an earthquake,

until you realise,

it's you with the shakes,

your head that's spinning.

The room isn't shrinking,

the eyes are not all

peering at you.

 

But I'm not fine,

my mind is doing summersaults,

just avoid the mental assault

that it is seemingly

dishing out to itself.

I feel under a cloud,

but even the rain

isn't pouring down on me,

That could have shocked

some life into my mentality.

Instead, I sit in dread,

a sharp stinging inside the head,

telling me that in this place

I'm not wanted. That I'd be safer in bed.

 

It's oh so easy, to just slip away,

fade out the weird strain of reality

which seems to surround you recently.

And sometimes

it's the right thing to do,

take a break from that

which is clouding you.

Find the hope inside,

and all the things

that pour happiness

from your skies.

Let those tears fall

from your eyes.

If you need, take a break

and come back stronger

on the other side.

 

 

Thanks for reading
Follow this link for more.
https://linktr.ee/Wordsandfluff

My latest book, "Journey"

the third part of my "Travels with pen trilogy"

is now available, with all of my other books, 

at Amazon

 

https://www.amazon.co.uk/stores/Kyle-Coare/author/B07GWQTN4M

 

Please buy a copy if you can

it would really help me
continue to do this.

Peace, Love & Poetry
Kyle

Sea of insecurity

 

Could someone throw

me a lifebelt? I think I'm sinking

My heart drops to the depths

of my stomach

like a stone

in a lake of frail tears.

I can't condone the way

my mind is thinking,

or control my breathing.

I'm a boat that is leaking

and I'm flooding with doubt

as I try to bail the waters out.

 

I know where my stars are guiding me,

and all I see before me

is a dark empty sea

with storm clouds crowding

the sky with menacing glee.

I don't have any answers,

and that scares me so much more.

I've always been so sure,

but now my heart sits

on the ocean floor,

dragging itself painfully to shore.

 

I know the questions,

but my mind can't reply,

like it got sucked

through a whirlpool

to another time.

The sunset dreams

seem so dark somehow,

when the heart knows

the hurt it could cause,

and in a round

of sarcastic applause

the gulls laugh with glee.

Seeing me sinking

into my own sea

of insecurity.

 

If I was to sit

where my heart

feels at home,

if I let my dreams roam,

if I found the place

where fantasy and reality

share a sweet caress,

then I'd be happy for a lifetime,

but that happiness

comes with knowledge

that my actions

could cause pain to others.

 

A tidal wave of emotion

smoothers the ocean,

as I float upon

these feelings held within,

and I whisper

to the air that will listen.

I love you.

Does that make me a bad person?

Or someone that listens

to his heart sat within still beating?

 

 

Thanks for reading
Follow this link for more.
https://linktr.ee/Wordsandfluff

My latest book, "Journey"

the third part of my "Travels with pen trilogy"

is now available, with all of my other books, 

at Amazon

 

https://www.amazon.co.uk/stores/Kyle-Coare/author/B07GWQTN4M

 

Please buy a copy if you can

it would really help me
continue to do this.

Peace, Love & Poetry
Kyle

The most precious gift

 

I exist within every breath,

in every nervous twitch,

each stuttered word

that you fear being heard.

I live between

one heartbeat

and the next.

In palms that sweat,

and cheeks that flush red.

 

I live amongst wistful sighs,

behind lustful eyes,

inside dumbstruck minds.

I live within those moments

that goosebumps prickle your skin,

when you can't stop thinking of them.

In the belly where

butterflies flap their wings.

 

I live in the scrawled poems

that you dare not send,

the love letters

scrunched up in the bin.

I place those images across your eyes,

the ones you see

when you sleep at night

and again, in the morning

when you rise.

 

I'm the songs that

make you remember when

you shared a kiss

in a momentary fantasy.

I'm the bliss of an unexpected message,

the connections, which keep thoughts tethered.

I am the warm weather,

that sparks imaginary

holidays together.

I am all the sights you see,

wishing to be able to share them

with that special somebody,

the heart you hold true,

when the loneliness

makes you feel blue.

I am the words you set free,

in hope that they will soar through the sky

and land at her feet.

 

I am love. The most precious gift.

A bouquet wrapped in a heartfelt kiss.

I am chocolates and roses,

I'm a sea full of soulful moments.

I am the hug you share,

the midnight glow up in the air,

I am love, and I see you,

patiently waiting there.

 

 

Thanks for reading
Follow this link for more.
https://linktr.ee/Wordsandfluff

My latest book, "Journey"

the third part of my "Travels with pen trilogy"

is now available, with all of my other books, 

at Amazon

 

https://www.amazon.co.uk/stores/Kyle-Coare/author/B07GWQTN4M

 

Please buy a copy if you can

it would really help me
continue to do this.

Peace, Love & Poetry
Kyle