Wednesday, 12 April 2023

Paid dues

 


Brush my eyelids closed.

Place your coins

to pay the ferryman

and let me sail away,

down the river of memories.

Past the old days,

when drink was a way of life,

a state of mind that seemed like

the only answer

to a question I'd never asked.

"How can I escape this dead-end path?"

 

Into the arms of my enemy I sank.

The poison I drank.

I fell more than stood, but I felt so good,

or so I thought.

The memories distort,

you forget about the hours of retching,

the spinning vision, the room stretching.

The lost hours, days,

the headaches

when exposed to the suns blinding rays.

"But I only do it to help me sleep"

Would seep from my lips,

nut it's more that sleep

was creeping out on me.

 

Furry mouth and bruises.

Contusions, confusion.

Stumbled feet try to replay the last steps,

but nothing sticks, it all slips through the cracks.

Every memory, date, name erased.

Mind a hazy maze of mistakes and forgotten pathways.

Scribbled over in biro ink,

significant moments that I can't link.

Memory like a sieve,

with all the important things flowing through,

just the odd useless fact left to baffle you.

 

I flooded.

Drowning in my own blood.

Something wrong,

these "good times"

were never good,

and now I'm falling,

fallen.

Stretched out like a canvas ready to paint,

red stains on yellow skin.

Needles piercing, doctors racing,

machines beeping,

coppery taste in my mouth

and I'm out.

 

Don't feel sorrow,

feel joy,

for a life less hollow.

A life that chose to walk

a different path

to the one

he was destined to follow.

I awoke, renewed.

I started to see with clearer view.

I started to do what I love to do.

Write the words I write to you.

 

 

 

Thanks for reading

Please take a look at my new collection "Torn Pages"

100+ all new poems not shared here before.

https://tinyurl.com/KCtornpages

Please follow the link for my books, videos and social media.
 
 
Every click, every book purchase, every like helps me to keep doing what I love.
 
Peace, Love and Poetry 
 
Kyle
 

No comments:

Post a Comment

Please comment here i will reply to all

Name

Email *

Message *